Monday, March 2, 2009

Nihilists In Spaaaaaaaaaaaaace!

Note: This is written for the Friday Challenge found here.

I rose on a column of flame above the speck of dust we humans call home. I rose into the vast Nothing of the universe. I gazed out at the Nothingness and it called to me. I came from Nothing. I go toward Nothing. All mankind's emotions are as Nothing against the emptiness that is our universe.

We are but a chance spark in the never ending darkness of Nothing, brief and ephemeral. Our lives are Nothing. My life is Nothing. And so I chose to give myself over to Nothing here and now.

After all, what could stop me? Nothing!

I stopped, confusion intruding on my thoughts. Perhaps I should try that again.

I would return to the Nothing that was my source and my destiny! Nothing could stop me!

Damn! There is was again. If Nothing could stop me, did that make Nothing Something? But if Nothing was Something, it could not be Nothing. By its very definition, Nothing is, well, nothing. There is no way Nothing can be both Nothing and Something at the same time.

Oh, wait! Obviously the overwhelming presence of Nothing had affected my mind. No, no, no! That couldn't be right, either. Nothing cannot have presence! To be surrounded by Nothing is to have, um, you know, nothing around you. So if there was some overwhelming presence, that would further indicate that there was Something.

That couldn't be right! Nihilism, mankind's greatest philosophical discovery, shows that everything is Nothing. And if everything is Nothing, there can't be Something getting in the way and screwing up my plan to embrace Nothing!

Wait! Embrace Nothing? That's another impossibility! You can embrace Something but not Nothing. What is going on here? All of my carefully laid plans for this journey to Nowhere to embrace Nothing are falling apart around me.

And while I'm at it, how can I journey to Nowhere? How would I know when I got There? Argh! There it is again! If you're Nowhere, there can't be any There there.

No, this is all becoming too complicated! I must take a few deep breaths, calm myself and realize I have Nothing to fear. Nothing to fear? Nothing to Fear? NOTHING TO FEAR? There I go again! Here I am, on a journey to Nowhere to embrace Nothing and now suddenly I discover I fear Nothing? How can I give myself up to Nothing if it scares me so much? That would take courage. Which is Something. Which is the exact opposite of Nothing. Which I want to embrace or which I fear or...or...or...Something.

C-c-could it be that my philosophy is wrong? But that would mean that Nihilism is Nothing. Which makes a weird kind of sense, actually. Nihilism says everything is Nothing, mankind is Nothing and all of mankind's works are Nothing. And nihilism is a discovery of mankind. By nihilism's own philosophy, that mean nihilism is Nothing as well!

Ah ha! I believe I've made a breakthrough! Nihilism is Nothing! And I have Nothing to fear. So I must fear nihilism. To fear a philosophy is to reject the philosophy. So I must reject nihilism and embrace Something! I wonder what it will be?

In awe, I look out the view port in search of Something to embrace. I see the moon. Hm... Should it really be as close as-